This morning getting ready, I was listening to the radio, and listening to the moms calling in telling their stories of dropping the kids off for the 1st day of school for the first time. I am in tears trying to put my make-up on (that went real well) sympathizing with them and realizing my day is getting closer. My sweet little boy is a week and a half away from starting his mother's day out program for the first time. Even though, it is just 2 days a week, it hit me as to why I am so sad, for me that is, I am SO excited and happy for him. This is the last few days of having him with me, by my side everyday, having our silly conversations, driving me crazy, counting down the hours til nap or bedtimes sometimes for the rest of his life. So from here on, it will never be he and I together everyday, and it breaks my heart a little because he is truly growing up faster than what maybe I am ready for. And now I have to drive off those 2 days putting my trust in his teacher that she will take care of him while I am not there and hoping it's enough. Now I feel like what maybe Brayden feels when he doesn't want to take a nap, afraid of what he might miss...what if I miss something so cute and so hilarious he said that day. Maybe now, as my husband reads this, he may understand a little bit better of why I may tear up a little over this next big step. But I promise you, I am so excited for my little B-boy and the stories he will come home with, and the friends he will make, and the memories that will be had from here on throughout his school life.
So with the sad also comes the happy, and with Brayden out of the house for a couple of days during the week, this will give Alex a chance of having some one-on-one time with me, which I am sure he will enjoy and so will I. Alex has so few and far between moments of just he and one of us w/o Brayden, so this will be a true treat. Ahhhh, and the chance to grocery shop with just one child...and one that sits in the basket and doesn't have to be told "put that back" or "get over here" a thousand times... just yet
So this was my moment to vent my feelings, as it will weigh heavy on my mind til the 1st day passes, and it just becomes our normal routine and one day barely being able to remember the days of having them with me everyday. *Sniff, sniff*